I still dont know why its called the "city of brotherly love..."

Hey. ok, so the past 24 hours have been some of my favorite of my life. let me recount them for you:

last night, myself, allyson, kate, her b/f logan, and matt a were all trying to decide what to do, cause everyone is done with exams and hanging out whatnot. we decided dinner was a good idea, so we went to wild wings. while there, matt a suggested that we go to philly for cheese steaks. nobody took him seriously except me, so i got everyone all riled up and, at about this time last night (~9:56 pm) we decided to go to philly!

so we left charlottesville at about 10:30, and on the way to philly decided there would be nothing to do when we got there at 3:30. so what would we do? we went to atlantic city, of course. we drove straight through to the shore to watch the sun rise at the beach, and the closest one was definitely there. but the sun didnt rise until later, so from 4-7, we just walked around the boardwalk and went inside all the casinos. we watched the sunrise later, which was absolutely gorgeous. i would put up a picture, but i dont have one yet. but it was awesome. there were many times i would stop and think- what are we doing in atlantic city at 5 am?! no answer, but the sunrise was totally worth it.

after atlantic city, we hopped back into kates super-tiny car (which i like, cause i like small spaces and i like curling up in a ball to sleep, especially when i can lean on someone) and then drove to philly for a cheese steak. problem was the one place we had directions to wasnt open and serving them by 9:00. slackers. so we got directions to "the best" place from a local named nicole and headed off. now. we knew it would take a while based one her directions, but we kept driving and looking for a turn, and didnt find it. the area kept getting worse and worse. we were a little confused, and not really all that scared until...

we noticed we were in the deepest ghetto i've ever seen. you dont believe me. we saw a car that was really just a frame of a former car that had been either set on fire or bombed. a freakin bombed out car. there were fires in trash cans. there were people wandering around with bottles in brown bags that were especially large. it was scary. 4 white uva kids riding around the ghetto of philly. and kate hands me the camera and asks me to take a picture.

i almost died.

luckily, nicole had given us her phone number, so we called her and proceeded to tell her our whereabouts, to which she replied "wow...you really are deep in the ghetto. you need to get out." yup, a native said it. i almost died, i tell you. we eventually got out cheesesteaks and left to come back to charlottesville, returning at about 3 this afternoon. best road trip ever? well, grottoes was awesome. but this is def. the best spontaneous one. im so happy i went.

this one is going to be a long one, guys. so here are some god thoughts:

so with all of this ben recovery stuff, ive been keeping a husband list, because ive been recognizing what i want and need in a husband. this isnt stuff i take lightly, but its stuff i know i legitimately need. so the exciting part is that matt a, who went on the philly trip last night, is someone who i hadnt known before, but i got to know on this trip. we only talked a bit, and mainly about family, future aspirations, interests, etc. but you know that when a jesus-loving man starts talking about anything, his heart shines through.

basically , i decided this guy is a lot like the person that i would want and need to marry. dont misunderstand, im not saying hes the one or even that i like him, but hes got the character traits that i recognize as totally desireable. hes a lot like ben, actually, but different. he's manly, but not so manly that he is macho. like, he doesnt need to prove it to other people, but he just is and he's strong; he loves jesus and that ties in with the strength to make the ultra-respectable leader that i want and need; jesus comes before his own desires (he was thinking about giving up marriage to be a priest, because maybe thats what god wants); he's a romantic at heart; he plays guitar; hes got amazingly chivalrous manners, and thats so important; if hes not a priest, hes in it for a wife and a family. not just for dating.

basically, those are the core ones. and why this is important with regards to god is that i feel like this is just more confirmation (added to the extra-a lot that ive been getting a lot) that god has someone awesome for me and i should put away these petty flirty games in preparation for the real thing. what i find amazing is that ive been so busy and so mentally sidetracked this semester that i havent gotten to seek god as much as usual. but the thing is, he isnt mad at me at all. i feel the natural draw, but god isnt mad at me for inconsistent love for him. so thank you, lord. and i will just keep seeking and waiting on whatever he has whenever. its a good place to be, in god's will. .

anyways, just an encouragement.
to recap: favorite moments: -logan kissing at a homeless person who was curled up on the beach, who he thought was a "boardwalk cat" (which they definitely posted signs about not feeding them...)
-almost dying in the philly ghetto
-the fact that i hate philly cheesesteaks
-almsot peeing my pants as i tore through the marriot lobby in search of a bathroom
-the boardwalk cats that nobody was supposed to feed
-the fact that i went to philly and never saw the liberty bell...jerks. im definitely going at some point.

ok, night.