Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving! I really like thanksgiving. its one of the holidays i look forward to most, especially being away at school, because i can legitimately sit around in my pajamas and eat all day and watch tv and not feel guilty about it later. because everyone knows you cant do homework on thanksgiving, and all the calories consumed dont really count...duh.

so let me premise my thoughts by saying that i am a stickler for tradition. scratch that- lets expand it to consistency. i hate change, and i dont like trying new things or being adventurous (except for sometimes) and i really just dont like change at all. and this is most strongly manifested during holidays. there are just certain things that are supposed to happen during certain holidays- you are supposed to have a christmas tree with white lights, an angel, and hallmark ornaments at christmas. youre supposed to watch the macys parade as soon as you wake up thanksgiving morning. i have to have deluxe macaroni and cheese for easter dinner. sure, these are little things to most people, but (maybe sadly enough?) they are foundational for my life. i cant go without them or my whole pattern and basically my whole life is just messed up if it changes.

and then this thanksgiving happened.

this year there are a lot of new things happening. in fact, for the whole time ive been in college things have been changing a lot, and its made me really uncomfortable but the fact that ive been able to run back to charlottesville before i was too affected made it ok. except now all this change is encroaching on my holidays, and im not ok with it. so i came home a little grumpy about this whole situation. perfect attitude for thanksgiving, huh?

and then i went to church wednesday night and had this revelation that whats been wrong with me lately is that ive been focused on my problems. ive had a realy difficult past few weeks with the whole ben situation, like really hard, and thats been weighing on me. so ive been distracted with that, among other things. but ie just been dwelling on it. and its not like there isnt time for that, because its ok. but it distracts my eyes from god, and if i could look at him and realize the blessings i have, even just in salvation (which isnt a "just") then i would be more thankful and less..devestated by my changing holidays.

just a thought!

e.r. time. and more cheese ball beckons!

happy thanksgiving!

club clemmons what what!

sooooooo i had excellent plans to get an astounding load of work done this week by staying up late and not sleeping a lot. and then i kept falling asleep and my life kept getting busier, and here it is wednesday and ive got a paper due tomorrow. ps its 11:52 pm.

i had Seek His Face, a huge campus wide worship event, tonight, and then ashley and i made plans to go to the library after. we had to stop for snacks, so ive got cheez-its and a slurpee. except its gone now. ANYWAYS we went to clemmons library, affectionately known as "club clemmons" because of its atypically social atmosphere. its crazy. it really is like a club, and if they had music, you wouldnt be able to tell the difference. im pretty sure people dance a lot in here anyways. and im definitely sure people come here to see and be seen. after all, all the hotties hang out here. anyways, im supposed to be writing a paper, and instead i keep getting distracted. i had to limit myself (yes, limit) to checking my email once every 10 minutes. so instead of creeping everyone out with how fast i respond to emails, i decided to keep a running log of all my distracted thoughts tonight. maybe this will help get them out? my life in club clemmons begins....NOW!:

12 am-i need to throw away my slurpee cup. hooray! a chance to get up.
12:01- i also need to decide where im going for spring break. i think mexico, but maybe colombia. pray for me, would you?
12:03- i wish i had some chocolate pudding right now. its only been 2 minutes? dang. time is passing so slowly...is that good or bad?
12:07- i really wanna try on ashleys engagement ring, but she wont let me. boo.
12:26- wow i havent checked my email in a while. or written. maybe im being cured of my chronic distraction!
12:28...maybe not. remember the ceiling tile survey from the Shim Chronicles? well, the ceiling in this library is very weird. it looks like a vent, kind of, a very large one. not tiles, just slats of metal. ick. i hate the library
12:30- i went to throw away ashleys cup and walked by a table that definitely smelled like alcohol. not the table itself, but the people at it. OH! So i was standing in line for the bathroom and there is a big dictionary on a podium outside of it, and i opened it up to "Sydney" and found a slew of great terms! Like Sydneyite, and (my favorite, and probably jessica's too) sydney blue gum! hahah! like blue lips! anyways...
12:39- so my computer is situated write in front of the copy machines, and this guy totally just hit on a girl who was at the copier. he pulled the old "have i met you before?" line. can you believe it?!? people actually say things like that..and she was like "no" but they had a conversation. so unbelieveably cliche. maybe i do live in a bubble. do people really use pick up lines when trying to hook up? is the "tennessee" pick up line acceptable? cause if it is im totally using it.
speaking of a good pick up line- "im a fermata...hold me" hahaha!

1:09- im falling asleep at the computer. how its happening, i dont know. but we decided to get out of here by 1:30. but one of my old friends just posted on my wall "glad to see youre staying single too". RIGHT. like i got dumped and have remained single by choice. smart one, clearly.
1:28- wow, im doing well! tuesday i went to barnes and noble and looked in the kids section for a necessary book. i found one on the shelf called "willis the farting dog" (except the name willis might be wrong..." and it was about this dog that farts all the time and one page says "and when uncle irv wants to let one go, he stands by willis" hahaha. oh man. i kinda wish i could ask for this for my classroom, but knowing my family, i will get it; knowing first graders, i wont be able to read it to them. fart is still a bad word back then, ya know.

ok. we're leaving. at 1:33. and its off to work on my lesson! i cant wait till i teach and can be in bed at 10. sigh.

goodnight!

a good day for overalls :)

Overalls are quickly becoming my all time favorite outfit. they're so comfortable and have so many pockets and they are easy (except when you have something in the bib pocket and you have to unbuckle the buckles to go to the bathroom). i just love them, and i find myself wondering how often i can wear them without being "the only girl who isnt pregnant but who always wears overalls anyways"

so today was pretty good and in a nutshell, i: taught a writing lesson to preschoolers (i know...how?), fell asleep in 2 classes, had an intense core group prayer time, broke one of the stair-steppers at the gym, and went to chi alpha.

recently ive been getting a lot of revelations from god. the most recent is this: basically, the fact that i am alive is enough reason to praise god because god made people for the purpose of bringing himself glory and praise. god doesnt owe me anything, so when you add salvation to basic living, thats enough to eternally indebt me to him as far as the currency of praise goes. my life could just consist of living and being saved, no matter what circumstances, and i would owe him praise. but thats not how god works. not only does he supply these, but out of his love he blesses me with friends and a family and clothes and food and everything we count as basic necessities. whats more, when he created me, he planted desires in my heart that match up with his plan, so that when i do his will, i am making myself happy in the process! he's such a loving god to do that, to make it so that we enjoy serving him and get so blessed out of it! thats just really exciting to me, i dont know if i can accurately convey it...

speaking of blessings, i was in the library tonight writing a lesson plan with my teaching partner, wezi, and a certain amazingly tall dark (and by dark i mean black) and extremely handsome man who may or may not lead a gospel choir i may or may not sing in walked in. i think i froze and stared at him. my mouth may have even been a little bit open. and he said hi to wezi, and then to me. i dont know if he remembers my name, but i dont care, because he asked it at some point.

but im still holding out for the one god has for me. i know he's coming, and until then i'll just keep fighting off these other lesser crushes.

ps- i miss you miss moneekuh! AND my sister might start reading my blog :) she reads knitting blogs, so i hope she will read mine anyways...

goodnight.

happyelectionday

I havent posted in a long time, and its a little crazy that i feel guilty about it. but i think its not just that i havent posted, its that ive been disconnected from a lot of people i normally talk to. like you, miss moneekuh. up until about 2 weeks ago i talked to you every day, we havent had a real conversation since. im not the biggest fan. i havent talked to kathryn either, or robster, and i havent called back my friend jason who bought a bible and wanted to know whether or not it was a good translation. i need to call some people i think. i dont know what ive spent my time doing. oh well.

so as for God, i basically have been realizing how little i've made him, and ive realized that in the context of my boy obsession, which im trying to repress. so remember that one time i said i had a crush on a boy that i shouldnt? yeah, you know who im talking about. well, i did decide i needed to leave it, and i have for the most part, like through my actions, but i havent figured out how to let it go heart-wise. and i've been so concerned with that, and so concerned with repressing it, that all my prayers have been focused on me and that and blah blah blah. so then yesterday i got a little view of that and prayed that God would give me a view of how big he is, and he answered immediately, because at XA they not only announced our spring missions trips locations (which i definitely will be going on, because its my passion! ) but we had a missionary from uganda, who is the mom of my XA friends, and she works to counsel the kids who live in the displacement camps and have been kidnapped by the LRA and have just done horrible things. like, she showed us an interview, and one of the girls was kidnapped at 9, forced to pray to a demon, and they forced her to kill 3 people including her dad. i cant even imagine.
-if you dont know anything about the LRA and uganda and such, than watch "Invisible Children," or google search the Lords Resistance Army in Uganda. please. i feel like everyone needs at least an awareness, even if you dont have a particular burden for it.
anyways, God just showed me how much bigger his plan is than what i see, and it helped put my whole dating/marriage/life dilemma into perspective. so. its all good i suppose. but still hard to try to direct my thoughts away from mr. adorable to God. ya know?

ps- i told my mom i wanted to marry a black man, and she was NOT excited or minimally amused. not at all. i need to pray about that.

i also need a quiet spirit. i feel like my energy is too much sometimes. its hard to explain.

anyways, life is good. basically, i feel like another thing monica and i cant talk about, in addition to my most recent past relationship, is politics. basically, i feel like voting is so incredibly important even if you dont feel strongly. oh man. and im a republican for the most part. great. ps- how funny would it be if someone won on a write in? i feel like we should just agree on someone to write in, and then see what happens. like jesus. lets all write in jesus. hahaha.

sorry this wasnt more interesting. i'll work on it, hun.

if youre looking for something amazing to cheer you up, go to www.happyfeetmovie.com and watch all 6 of the trailers. its crazy how addictively cute they are. im counting down to the movie release date!

homework time.